2011-01-11T15:42:00.000-08:00

i am having some issues with using muscle testing. i am having trouble with trusting the accuracy of my results. this point has been my excuse for not practicing much at all. i do start, and then after getting through maybe 1 or 2, sometimes 4 and 5 I stop because I do not trust my answers. when I begin, when i ask myself what is my yes and what is my no, i feel confident, and when i ask what is my indicator and what is my change i am by enlarge confident. then as i begin, I am not confident anymore. also i do not always trust my starting point results, and then i do some small sf. at the moment i will do some sf because i am not trusting my results.

i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think my results are not accurate.

i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be irritated at having to take my time and make sure i trust my results.

i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be irritated that i have to take my time and make sure my results are accurate.

i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to try and hurry up and get through the muscle testing, instead of being here in the moment of testing.

i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to worry about how long it will take to get through the charts, instead of breath by breath moving through my chart.

i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear not getting the right answer.

i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe my answer might be inaccurate.

i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear slowing down the rest of my group because i am not muscle communicating effectively.

SF Continued

2008-08-11T16:39:00.000-07:00

As I sit here I am in process. How I am doing in this process of stopping my mind? Have I now defined msyelf as in process. (SF) Thoughts come and these thoughts play in my mind and in moments I realize this. Then I stop and I focus on breathing and realizing I am Here.

I have fears that I am no longer accepting and allowing myself to be one with. Fear has been manifesting within and as me and now it Stops. Because I have realized that fear I not real, fear only exists in me through my acceptance and allowance. I direct me in this moment without my mind. Though I and my mind are one and equal, and my mind is also going through a process of realization. All is in this. I am HERE and all that exists around me is part of me one and equal... As I type the keys that I use are me and I am them. And the monitor in which the words appear these words I type are one with me.

Who am I?

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing fear to exist within and as me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that Fear exists.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing an automatic response of Fear to exist within me from hearing loud noises.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that drinking caffeinated beverages causes me to be nervous.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as shy.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as reserved and thus separating me from me.

I am not defined by anything outside of self. I am one and equal with all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am quite.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as quite.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to Fear voicing and speaking up and being me out of Fear of someone else rejecting me.

I forgive myself for not allowing me to be just be me in the moment and holding back my expressions out of fear.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowng myself to regret not speaking out and expressing msyelf in moments where I am this expression, but instead surpress it.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear war.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear missiles.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear bombs exploding and killing life.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear certain loud plane noises.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to react in fear from hearing a certain loud banging noises.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to automatically respond in fear from loud plane noises in the sky.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to react in fear from hearing a loud noise.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being in the dark
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear sleeping at night with the lights off.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear death and dying.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to Fear losing my body
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define me as my body.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear speaking up and asking questions in a class out of fear other will judge me as unintelligent.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am nervous in a class that has a lot of people in it.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to Fear asking questions to the instructor. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am less intelligent than other people in the class. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that my question will not be intelligent.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear asking a question to the instructor believing that the instructor will believe me to be unintelligent in the question I ask.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge myself as inferior and slow in taking longer to figure something out.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am slow in my ability to problem solve.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe I am nervous when entering an environment with a lot of people.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing fear to exist within and as me when I enter a social environment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am fear when I enter a social environment.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that other people are staring at me and judging me as inferior when I enter a place with other people.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge myself by my skin color.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am inferior to others because of my skin color.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being in an environment with a lot of people that these people will judge me for being different.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as inferior to other people around me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear speaking up and expressing myself for fear others will judge me as stupid.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am stupid
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am nervous when asked to do as task.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge myself as not being able to communicate effectively.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I need to led by others and not lead myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I not capable of taking care of myself and having to rely on others for my safety and shelter.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am not capable of doing a good job in a work environment on my job duties.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be me here in each moment as I am out of fear that other will judge me as inferior.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that intelligence is determined by test scores. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be live that I need make up to be accepted by others around me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that my hair is not as beautiful as others because it is short and not a certain texture. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am not as good as a person with lighter skin. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to place value on skin color. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become angry at myself for believe myself to less intelligent because of my skin color. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that black people are less intelligent than non black people. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that whites are superior. We are one and equal and I forgive myself for accepting and allowing I to believe that intelligence is important. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to compare myself to others in separation of myself and who I am as all as one and equal with everything.
I should STOP relax stop rushing and believing I need to rush and have everything right away. I should be in this moment and not allow my mind to rush me into a future or past that does not exist and not real. With each Breathe I am here and I should not allow single moment to pass by without realizing me in that moment. I direct me, and my I stop my mind from directing me. I stop fear from directing me. I stop thoughts feelings and emotions from directing me. This is who I am in this moment. I am this world and each being is me and each tree plant and animal is me. Each object is me. The world as thoughts feeling and emotions as consciousness is ending. But life as who I in being realized. I am not afraid. Fear does not exist. All that exist is me here in this moment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to Fear dying. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as my relationships. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as my relationship to my boyfriend. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I need my boyfriend to take care of me. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear losing my boyfriend. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I fear not having a boyfriend to sleep with at night and that I would be alone. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am not able to take care of myself and stand alone in this world. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear not having a boyfriend to have sex with and being alone. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear getting a job and having to interact with other people. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that the people I work with will judge me as inferior and not capable of doing a good job. I forgive myself for a accepting and allowing myself to believe that I will not be able to good job at work. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hide in my room and avoid people for fear people will believe me to be inferior. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear facing other being that I will be angry that they are not realizing the world around them and not applying self forgiveness self honesty and self realization. I forgive myself for a accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am separate from other people who are not in the process of self realization. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to allow anger to exist within and as me. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that anger exists.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to regret the not helping my mom out more in activities and chores around the house. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to regret not spending more time with mom. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to regret not communicating more with my mom. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to regret not helping my mom out with chores. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to regret allowing myself to become frustrated with my mom when she asks me to certain things. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear not being able to function without my moms help and support and thus accepting and allowing myself to become angry when she ask me do a chore. I forgive myself for a accepting and allowing myself to become angry that I allowed myself to be angry at myself for being frustrated with my mom.

I forgive myself for acceting and allowing msyelf to belive that I am tired.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I need 8-10 hours of sleep at night to be healthy.
I forgive msyelf for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I need more 4-6 hours of sleep at night in order to not be tired.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am sleepy for not getting enough sleep.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to belive that I am tired because I did not get enough sleep.
I forgive myself for accpeting and allowing msyelf to believe that I need sleep in order to not be tired.

I am not tired because I did not get enough sleep last night.

SF Continued.

SF Continued